Why do the people on TV try so dog-on hard?
I see you in the red lipstick, in the video, moving your hips, looking all confused with a smile. I see you news anchor, trying to stay inside that suit. Your body is screaming for more room in that size 8 when the more comfortable size is really a 12. I hear and see you news reporter trying to maintain that lifeless monotone robotic voice, sounding the way you think a reporter is supposed to sound. I see you reality show trying to force those singers into an already made, one size fits all, mold, when they want artistic freedom to just be. They even have coaches to keep up this façade or what we think perfection is. Just because you color inside the lines don’t make it automatically perfect. Perfection can’t be forced. Only allowed. We don’t have to try so hard. But we do. Those thoughts are telling us that we got to have that hair fried dyed and laid to the side and those eyebrows arched and penciled in like black Crayola marker to the 100th power. I saw your eyebrows before I could get to know the real you. It’s a distraction. Changing our bodies to be tucked, sucked and pulled in. Trying to hold on to 25, when 45 has approached you so gracefully. Baby 25 came and gone. Stop butchering your vessel.
Mr. CEO is this what you’ve forced your employees to come up with? You package it up feeding me and my family your TV. I don’t see how half the shows or news stories make it to air. Leading me away from what really is by airing last week’s story a quadrillion times like it’s happening in this moment. At the same time sending hidden messages all because it’s stacking your and the shareholders pockets. I know I have a choice to turn it off or walk away and I do. But the sad thing is that you can’t even keep it real. You are purposely tricking me, and trying to keep me trapped inside a dark box. I’m glad I’ve got my flash light. Let me loan mine to you while you read the rest of this story.
I know I’m dwelling on perfectionism but, it’s because you can’t hear me yet. Are we playing a role, in a movie in our head, that we are secretly hoping to get an academy award for, or is it that we don’t want to do the work on our inner-self? Why are we so addicted to forcing the act of Perfection? Blame it on Momma or Daddy or society or conditioning, or something else outside yourself it’s all the same. But it’s you. Yes you! Now don’t trip because I called you out and don’t get it twisted because I am just like you and we all need each other so no one can escape this experience. So now that we got EGO checked back into its prison cell on block 666 let’s continue.
Let me remind you how Perfect you are already! You woke up this morning and you are breathing. Perfect!
When you are all in your head and feelings dreading the things you don’t want to do today, yesterday and tomorrow and your child is calling your name 3 trillion times, trying to knock you out of your self-induced coma, so you can get out of your thoughts, and be present to life. Perfect!
When you are trying to figure out how to rob Peter to pay Paul and that 65 dollar check comes in the mail that you forgot about or didn’t see coming. Perfect!!
When you have searched for a job for months and you just want to work and that inner voice says don’t give up, keep trying because something bigger and better is on its way. When one door closes another opens and that’s Perfect!!
When you’ve done everything in your being to help that hard-headed child and nothing you say sinks in their head, because they think they know everything, but you know because it’s a road you’ve traveled and can see your mistakes in them CLEARLY, AND, you feel like giving up on them, BUT your LOVE is too strong to give up on them. Perfect!
When your medical deductible is so ridiculously high that it makes more financial sense not to have surgery and you feel screwed or wronged by the healthcare system and insurance company because you are only trying to do the right thing. The next day comes and you still don’t know how you are going pay for the surgery but you have an internal unwavering faith that tells you or gives you the knowing that things are going to be alright, because you are not alone and you have your faith to stand on… Perfect!
When you are driving and you know good and well you should have filled up your gas tank 40 miles ago and the gas light is on and you literally roll into the gas station right in front of the pump with a gas tank that is empty, but you made it. Perfect!
When the politicians are working for themselves and not for you and your family and you finally surrender to yourself and do something about it. Perfect!
Stop and take a look at the trees, the animals and each other they are all our reminders of what is and who we are. Can you see and feel the beauty around and within us? It really is Perfect! For now I’m turning off the noise on TV and I’m going to just be. I want you to know that you are perfect, mistakes and all. Without our experiences we wouldn’t be who we are today in this moment. So lift your head up and be proud, keep doing you and I’ll keep being me. We can be perfect together. Let the church say, Amen. Haha Perfect!!
© 2015 by Allura Eshmun