It’s the yummy smelling fragrances of cinnamon and nutmeg that entombs my body and fills my nose with sweet goodness. In our house it’s the aroma of delicious strawberries and peaches traveling through the air. Over my grandmother’s house it’s the smell of butter, sage, celery and onion cooking on the stove. At my parents house it’s the feeling of love, comfort and wanting to fill up on family. Memories of the holidays sometimes create chills of excitement.
Life’s events and returning home for the holidays come together like a baseball game. Running through all the bases of life and then returning home, to home plate. Each base represents milestones we’ve created, and that have helped us come into who we are right now. We are all running through our bases at different speeds but it’s all the same game. Getting to home base resets us and changes the game, our game. I’ve grown a lot and sometimes it feels like my family hasn’t but it doesn’t matter because coming home to base during the holidays is a reminder of where my journey started.
During the holiday season my mind travels backwards and comes forward to put all the memories together and into perspective. Seeing most of my family members I only get to see once a year, even though we live in the same city, is a good thing. Sometimes I don’t want to see them but in my heart it’s great to know first hand that they are okay. I swear, sometimes, it’s like stepping into a time machine most holidays. Some family members ain’t never changed and not never going to! Yes, I said not never. When we finally get together it’s like watching a movie. Each character deserves an Academy Award for the drama they spread and for simply being who they are.
Everyone’s got a character in their family that you love and hate at the same time. You love them because they are always themselves and you hate them because they love to go around the room telling people’s truth or their version of it.
There are the alpha’s. The grandmother and grandfather in the family who lead and keep everybody together. Even the family members who can’t stand each other. When the alpha speaks everyone listens.
Then you have the uncle that’s always got that barrel of Mickey’s and scotch. His breath reeks booze and he’s telling stories about everybody. So you sit laughing til your head hurts, with popcorn in your lap, like you are watching a movie or you are wanting to go into hiding and hoping he does not tell your story next.
Or that other relative that does not come out of the room at grandma’s house, or the relative that never ever ever shows up to family functions. When they show up everybody stops and looks like they’ve seen a ghost because they can’t believe their eyes. To the little ones it’s like a mystery unfolding.
There’s the family member who is the traveler. They’ve traveled the world and eager to tell where they have been and what they plan to do. They’ve got non stop stories to tell. You are taken back because they seem more like strangers even though you come from the same family. The traveler has traveled so much that the only way they can relate to family is to tell stories about themselves from abroad.
Can’t forget the hypochondriac. They are always complaining about their health. They have a headache, back ache, finger print ache. You name it. You want to escape their presence like the plague is coming right now. They have every drug on them and have seen every doctor you can think of and never heard of. They have tried every new diet and home remedy and want you to try their latest one as soon as you get home.
You can never seem to escape the family member who never stops talking. You try not to be rude but keeping your eyelids open is a challenge. They’ve got stories for DAYS. It’s like oh my God do they ever stop talking. Wait, do they even know what they are saying. By the time the day is over you can’t remember what the hell they were talking about.
Then there is the family member that can’t cook or they are slipping on a recipe they are known to prepare well and everyone is trying to be nice to their face but frowning and running away from the food they cooked like it’s poison.
Finally we can’t forget those family members who come with nothing and leaves with massive samples of everything that was cooked during the holiday. It’s like you see them and now you don’t. They’ve escaped with that last piece of Auntie’s pound cake you had your mouth set on and by the time you had room in your belly the cake was packed up and gone.
I know I’m writing about the good, the truth, the ugly and some of which should be unsaid but all the different personalities I described are mine, my family. Even though the things they sometimes do is embarrassing and I want to run to escape their presence there is so much that I can learn from each person/spirit. I am blessed that they are and will always be themselves. They are part, of the fabric, of my life. I am grateful. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t need all the fancy gifts but I do need and want my family and those who love me. Can you feel that? That is powerful and no money in the world can buy what only family and friends can give. I know that I am a part of something bigger than me and the holidays help me to remember that..
This holiday season I hope you get a chance to enjoy time with those people who mean the most to you. Time is precious and priceless.
Have a blessed Holiday !!
©2015 by Allura Eshmun